Thursday, July 07, 2005

In the middle, dammit!

He's the kind of guy I would definitely date, were I single. Handsome, ambitious, driven. He's caring and loving and expressive, loves children, wants a family, will go to the ends of the earth for you.

She's the kind of girl that's had it rough. Abusive boyfriends, a child at 19, no one to ever show her how special she deserves to be treated. She's stoic and closed off when it comes to emotions. She needed someone to love her, teach her that she was worth something.

It only seemed natural that they should fall in love. I didn't exactly hook them up or anything, but I will admit that, when asked my opinion, I urged both sides to give it a try.

Over the past couple of years they've lived together, done all sorts of fun things together. They've shared trips to Vegas, New York, Tampa, Buffett concerts. He's romantic, cooks fancy dinners, spoils her rotten, considers her daughter his own.

But she can't change. She can't open herself up and let him inside. I suppose I should be able to relate to this, being an active participant in a terrible relationship myself. But I see the way he looks at her, the way he gives himself completely to her, and I can't understand how she doesn't see it, too. How can she be so closed and cold to him?

This week, after he returned from a fishing trip to Canada, she dumped him. Spent the week he was gone emptying her stuff from his house. Left nothing of herself behind but a memory and a garden full of flowers they planted together that he must now tend alone.

He cried today as I hugged him, said he just didn't get it. Promised that he'd try harder, if she'd let him. And I, being a total loser when it comes to speaking my heart, could offer only palatatudes and cliches.

And it's really my fault that he's hurting this way. I should know better than to try and play cupid, but it's so hard when you see two folks both missing something in their lives.

Damn, it feels like I'm the one breaking hearts.

2 Comments:

At 6:51 PM, Blogger Laura said...

Speaking of clichés, what is it, "Better to have loved and lost than-" you know. It's true, I think. So don't worry. He'll look back on it all later and realize that too.

 
At 6:15 AM, Blogger Mommyleek said...

I really hope you're right, Laura. It's sad that he can sit there and admit all of his faults, describe them perfectly and map out a plan of how to fix them, and yet she is completely unwilling to give him the chance. I'm done with this situation, other than the listening part. I can't let myself feel responsible anymore or else I'm going to end up hating a pretty decent friend.

 

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