2 am

This has always been the witching hour for me. It's like my internal clock has a built in alarm and no snooze button. 2am and I'm wide awake. I should be trying to get all the sleep that I can. I mean, in less than 12 hours I'll have my feet planted firmly on Memphis soil, and we all know that there'll be little sleeping going on then.

Between my own personal quirks, and the upset of J-man's routines, it's going to be a whirlwind of a trip... hardly a vacation at all.

And Jonas is getting sick again. I guess it's his time of year to shine. I called the pediatrician's office yesterday to see if they'd renew his meds but they insisted on seeing him again. However, with it being the day after a holiday, they were also closing early, and by the time I weasled my way out of work, it was too late. Go figure. So we'll suffer through, and if he gets incredibly bad, I guess we'll shell out the big bucks to see a doctor in Memphis. I think the quack I used to see as a kid is still in practice. That guy let me go twelve years with nearly constant strep throat and never once thought that maybe removing my tonsils would be of benefit. Got them out when I was 14, haven't had it since.

But I'm sure he can diagnose an ear infection/sinus infection and refill already prescribed meds, right?

And really, I'm worrying about the small stuff. It's just that last year, after our trip to Memphis, is when Jonas came down with all the crap that landed him in the hospital and all those tests and needles. Ugh. Don't ever want to do that again. Don't ever want to see my son so sick.

I think about Erin and all she's going through with Nova, and I pray every day that his battle has a happy ending. I couldn't imagine the thought of my own child facing such difficult surgeries, or the potential for losing him. She's a stronger woman than I could ever be. I guess, when faced with something like that, you just become stronger because it's all you can do. There's no option. But still... I don't know if I could do it. Not once, much less twice. So I send her my prayers and my thoughts, since really that's all I can do. It seems so trite, doesn't it?

The suitcases are packed, sitting by the door. Just need to throw the last minute stuff in there. There's always the last minute stuff, isn't there? Not just stuff like the toothbrush and the cell phone charger, either. Stuff that you totally forgot, or didn't realize you'd need until the last possible second. And I know that the minute we get on the interstate and we're on our way to the airport I'll realize that there's something incredibly important still sitting here on my desk. That's always the way it works.

I'm an obsessive packer. Not so much for myself as I am for Jonas. It's not like we're going to some foreign third-world country, for God's sake. There's a Wal-Mart on every streetcorner in America. I'm sure I can buy anything I've forgotten, but I have this huge fear of forgetting something. I guess it's just the fact that you're away from everything normal, and your whole routine is shot. I'm not a set in stone person, but every person has their comfort zone and their routine, and it's going to be interesting to see how this goes.

For god's sake, we're hurricane people, we should know how to live like nomads, shouldn't we? And we do, so why am I obsessing?

But I'm just rambling because I don't know what else to do. It's late... or early, depending on how you look at things. It's cold in here, and I can't sleep and there's really nothing going on in the cobwebbed attic of my little temple.

So I'll stop wasting your time, and I'll wish you a Happy New Year and tell you all that I love you, and wish you nothing but the best. And providing I survive the next 5 days, I'll talk to you all real soon.